As I sit and daydream of a clean house with white walls and white floors and fluffy white throws to snuggle I’m reminded tomorrow is garbage day and if I miss it I won’t fit anymore trash into the bin. I open the blinds to look outside a sort of motivation to bring the trash to the curb but the sun blinds me so I close them and recede back into the shadows of my home. Tea is made and punishing myself for the state of my home I click through images of the one who will never be mine and the job I’ll never return to. It pulls me to write and while I scroll through I notice an article that features images of human heads. I’ve never seen it before and I’m fascinated but sickened and my stomach turns. I wonder briefly how he could look at this stuff and when I go to close the page I have to look just once more. I had to study the eyes. I had to see if lifeless looked different from lifeful. I walked to the trash to process what I just saw. I tipped and rolled the bin to the curb. I had to hold the top closed because if not I would have spilled trash everywhere only making more work for myself.